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Sunday, 29 November 2009

Depression

"I don't know what to do, I think that maybe, I'm in over my head."

"Why is it that my friends don't even bother to notice I'm dying inside? That my heart has been torn out and all they do is just live their lives like they always have? They don't even take the time to ask how I am or what I'm doing anymore ... everyone just seems to be slipping away and all I can do is wonder why. It's a shame -- the people you thought were your 'best friends' get their own lives, and they don't even notice how yours has been torn apart."

"What you see is only half of what I am. I have a hundred different faces, a million different personalities. Only a part of me is what I show you. I display a fraction of my true self. Everything is just a facade. It's not the truth of me. You don't know me. You never will." - Jackie

"Some people have one of those days ... I have one of those lives."

"A fool will lose tomorrow reaching back for yesterday. Then I guess I'll be a fool forever, I'll always reach for yesterday."

"It was silly of me to believe that if I just opened my heart things would come naturally; joke's on me." - TLC

"Every time people ask me if I'm okay it's just a reminder that I'm not."

"I love sleep...my life has a tendency to fall apart when I'm awake." - Hemmingway

"I'm trapped inside my own mind -- afraid to open my eyes, cause of what I'd find and I don't want to live like this anymore." - Lifehouse

"Just once I want someone to look at me and right away and think I was beautiful. Not after they get to know me, or after they see inside my soul just me. I want to walk in a room, and light up, not blend."

"I want to be remembered as the girl who always smiles even when her heart is broken, and the one who could always brighten up a day even if she couldn't brighten her own."

"If I had my life to live over, I'd try to make more mistakes next time. I would relax, I would limber up, I would be crazier than I've been on this trip. I know very few things I'd take seriously any more. I'd certainly be less hygienic. I would take more chances, I would take more trips, would scale more mountains, I would swim more rivers, and I would watch more sunsets. I would eat more ice cream and fewer beans. I would have more actual troubles and fewer imaginary ones. oh, I've had my moments, and if I had to do it all over again, I'd have many more of them, in fact I'd try not to have anything else, just moments, one after another, instead of living so many years ahead of my day. if I had it to do all over again, I'd travel lighter, much lighter than I have. I would start barefoot earlier in the spring, and I'd stay that way later in the fall. and I would ride more merry-go-rounds, and catch more gold rings, and greet more people and pick more flowers and dance more often, if I had it to do all over again, but you see I don't." - Jorge Luis Borges

"There's happiness out there. Somewhere. I know there is. I'm just too sad to look." - Jacqueline Kelly

"Things are never what they seem. I'm stuck inside of someone else's dream. Problems never go away. I'm sick of being caught in yesterday." - the ataris, "angry nerd rock"

"Sometimes I lie awake at night and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'" - Charlie Brown

"I just want to forget the past three years. The thing is, those past three years have been the best years of my life." - The Wonder Years

"I love rain because it hides my tears so well."

"So many I considered closest to me, turned on a dime and sold me." - Mariah Carey

"The cracks in the concrete just remind me that no matter how strong you are, you'll just fall apart anyway." - Boxer

"Now I am just a silhouette down there, a silhouette of a memory of a solitary night .. nothing more." - Juliana Theory

"Sometimes I wish I was a little kid again. Skinned knees are easier to heal than broken hearts."

"I realize I'm in one of those stages where I'm mad at the world, I'm like daring the world to push me off a cliff...just to see if I can fly."

"I just want to feel safe in my own skin. I just want to be happy again. I just want to feel deep in my own world. But I'm so lonely I don't even want to be with myself anymore." - Dido

"I discovered who were my real friends. I just wished that wasn't the way I had to discover." - Trista Britton

"The thing about crowds is that I'm all alone in them." - Jacqueline Kelly

"Memories just linger and don't seem to go away. Why can't I be happier? Today's a brand new day. The confusion I'm feeling now won't disappear over night, but someway, somehow, everything will be alright."

"If I had one wish it would be to have no reason to make one."

"On the outside I'm always smiling, but on the inside I'm always dying."

"I think I've been true to everybody else but me."

"When I was younger, crying always seemed to be the only answer, now that I'm older, crying seems to be the only option."

"For once I wish one of my wishes would come true, then maybe my life wouldn't seem so bad."

"The only thing standing between me and total happiness is reality."

"Sometimes things just don't make sense and all of a sudden I get scared." - Man in the Moon

"There is a voice, that has no name. It comes with evening or behind the rain. I have no time now, to stop and explain, I just keep movin, cause it helps to ease the pain. The night has music that calls to me, across the canyons of an endless sea. I seek the shadows, of yesterday. Today can't hold me, so I must be on my way. Speak to me softly but tell me no lies. I see tomorrow shining in your eyes. I have no time now to stop and explain, I just keep movin cause it helps to ease the pain."

"I'm still drying my tears, getting over my own fears."

"I want to kiss the scars that my own daggers left." - J.Kavanaugh

"I live with the stars where I may dream and pretend that everything is still all right with the world."

"You asked me what was wrong, I smiled and said nothing .. then you turned around and a tear came down and I whispered to myself, 'Everything is...'"

"If these are the best years of my life, then I am in for some serious second degree burns in my future."

"I'm sick of reality. I want a Fairy Godmother. "

"I'm so sick of immaturity, of name calling, of labels, of gossip, of high school. It doesn't make sense anymore, and I find myself being nice to people that I want to strangle."

"Do you think I relish the fact that I have to act like Mary Sunshine 24/7 so I can be considered a lady? I'm the Marcia fucking Brady of the upper East Side and sometimes I want to kill myself." - Cruel Intentions

"This would be really funny, if it wasn't happening to me."

"My life has been one great big joke, a dance that's walked, a song that's spoke. I laugh so hard I almost choke when I think about myself." - Maya Angelou

"Things are getting to me. Just how people are. How they always expect you to be a certain way. Even your best friend." - My So-Called Life

"There is only one rain cloud in the sky …and it's raining on me. Somehow I'm not surprised." - Eeyore

"I'm willing to do anything to calm the storm in my heart." - Savage Garden

"I will be fine. I'm always fine. This is my perfect little life. I smile. I laugh. Nothing ever goes wrong. Nothing..." - Jacqueline Kelly

"And inside I can hide my sorrow."

"I'm slowly dying inside. Again." - Jacqueline Kelly
hmm..

Of all the words of tongue or pen, the saddest are those...it might have been."
"Who do you turn to when the only person who can stop you from crying is the one who is making you cry?"
"I understand that with loves comes pain, but why did i have to love so much?"
"The part that hurts me the most, is knowing that I once had you and then lost you..."
"The worst feeling in the world is giving all the love you have and knowing it will never be returned."
"Its hard to pretend you love someone when you don't but its harder to pretend that you don't love someone when you really do."
"How do you heal a broken heart? I have no idea where to start because everything I do reminds me of you. "
"Have you ever noticed that the worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and you can never have them?"
"I'm afraid to love afraid to love so fast, because every time I fall in love it never seems to last."
"We were like Romeo and Juliet. I thought we'd do anything for each other. But Romeo didn't break Juliet's heart."
"As I sat here I was trying to think of all the times you hurt me and made me cry. . . Hoping and wishing it would make me like you less. But it didn't. Because all the times I could remember were the ones when you showed me that you cared. . . I didn't want to believe that you ever did You walk by me everyday and say hello. Everyday you take time out to listen to me. You talk to me, smile at me, laugh with me, and have fun with me. Well, I talk, smile and laugh too, but inside I'm hurting. Deep down it hurts to be with you because I love you and you are only a friend."
" There are times when I cant decide whether to see you or not, I want to see you because I miss you but there are times when I dont want to see you because everytime I do, the fact that you dont see me the way that I see you hurts me even more ... "
Sad quotes

~ She says she doesn't care, but her eyes tell a different story.
~ Behind my smile is a hurting heart. Behind my laugh, I'm falling apart. Look closely at me and you will see, the girl I am...isn't me.
~ To tell you the truth, I've just been avoiding everything.
~Don't say you know me, when I don't even know myself.
~ I think I'm afraid of being happy because everytime I'm happy, something bad always happens.
~ Just once I want someone to look at me right away and think I was beautiful. Not after they get to know me, or after they see inside my soul, just me. I want to walk in a room and light up, not blend.
~ I know God wouldn't give me anything I can't handle, I just wish he didn't trust me so much.
~ A golden heart stopped beating, working hands went to rest. He broke many hearts to prove to us, he only takes the best.
~ When I do something great, no one ever seems to remember, but when I do something wrong, no one can ever seem to forget.
~There is only one rain cloud in the sky...and it's raining on me. Somehow I'm not surprised.
-Eeyore-
~ I wake up and think dreams are real. I sleep so I don't have to feel.
~ It's not that I wanna have it, it's just that I wanna deserve it.
~ I don't know if you've ever felt like that. That you wanted to sleep for a thousand years, or just not exist, or just not be aware that you do exist, or something like that. I think wanting that is very morbid, but I want it when I get like this. That's why I'm trying not to think. I just want it all to stop spinning.
-The Perks of Being A Wildflower-
~ Walking down the hall with her head held high, every hair is in its place, sees a friend and she waves hi, wearing a smile on her perfect face. Friendly, smart, and beautiful, everyone adores this girl. Seemingly content, her head's in a whirl. Inside she's unhappy, and doesn't know why. She lays in her bed at night and cries. She doesn't know what causes the tears; how could this princess have insecurities or fears? She has it all. A pretty smile, many friends, a great guy, the newest trends, her family has money, she gets good grades, has her own car, and her makeup never fades. Always looking happy, every single day, but inside she's feeling a different way. This is wonder girl, she's everyone's dream, but things aren't always what they seem.
~ I don't deserve you...I never did.
~ Behind my smile is everything you'll never understand.
~ No matter what, no matter who, no matter what I do, somebody hates me. -Reel Big Fish-
~ Cause fucking up takes practice, and I feel I'm well rehearsed.
~ I didn't want to admit it. It was easier to lie. Hide the hurt and emptiness to smile instead of cry.
~ I've learned it takes years to build up trust, but only seconds to destroy it.
~ Life doesn't hurt until you think about how much things have changed, who you've lost along the way, and how much of it was your fault.
~ Why can't you just love me for who I am?
~ Have you ever felt so alone and nothing makes sense? Well that's how I feel right now...I feel like I'm facing everything myself, with nothing but tears and a fake smile...
~ I don't know if I'm getting better or just used to the pain.
~ Sometimes I wish I could just be a little kid again. So when life gets tough you can just play pretend. I wanna go back to when Santa did exist. When your daddy was the only boy you ever kissed. When Disney World was the best place to be. When the only movies you could see were rated G. When your biggest problem was learning to write your name and people didn't change...and your friends were the same. And every time you were sad or you had a bad day. You could just run to mommy and it would all be okay. I wanna go back to no hurt...and no pain...just laughter. When everyone always lives happily ever after.
~ When I cry at night, the only thing I can think to myself is...how can I seem so---perfectly fine in the morning. Why do I smile like nothing is wrong? And how does not one single person notice that I'm not okay?
~ I don't know what I want in life. I don't know what I want right now. All I know is that I'm hurting so much inside that it's eating me, and one day, there won't be any more of me left. Everything that ever cause a tear to trickle down my cheeks, I run away and hide from it. But now, everything is unwinding and finding its way back towards me. And I don't know what to do. I just know that the pain I felt so long ago, it's hurting ten times more.
~ Teardrops slowly fall from my eyes as I look to the sky, and I question how come life keeps passing me right on by. I just wonder why I can't escape, is this my fate? To always be unhappy and how much longer must I wait...
~ Words hurt more than anything else can, because they last, sometimes forever.
~ It sucks to be alone, even when there are people all around you. -Scrubs-
~ I wanna get lost from my life sometimes, sit on the side and watch the world go by, I wanna get lost and I don't know why. -Everclear-
~ Have you ever lived my life, have you ever spent one minute in my shoes? If you haven't, then tell me why you judge me like you do.
~ Every morning you get up and put on a fake smile...but what if one morning you didn't? Would anyone notice?
~ I'm not saying I have nothing. I'm not saying I'm gone completely. It's just sometimes it's all a bit too much to handle. Sometimes I feel like it's too much. I'm not going to do anything stupid because I know it will get better, it has to right? Otherwise there wouldn't be anyone who would live past their teenage years. But for now, just for now, it hurts.
~ You know sometimes, like when someone dies, and you're sad, and it's ok to be sad? But then there are times when you're supposed to be happy but you're sad anyway...and those times are even worse than the times when you're supposed to be sad.
~ I just don't feel like I know myself very well right now, so how can I be sure about anything? Most of the time I feel so awkward, you know, like I don't belong in my own skin, I get frustrated at everything, I could just scream and there's no reason for it, I just hate myself.
Drinking quotes

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

~ Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life.

~ When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!

~ To alcohol, the cause of, and soloution to all of life's problems. *Homer Simpson*

~ A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts.

~ The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.

~ You can always retake a class, but you can never relive a party.

~ Oh, well, of course, everything looks bad if you remember it.
*Homer Simpson*

~ Friends don't let friends drink alone.

No one will ever know, the pain I feel inside....

There's this girl in the mirror, I wonder who she is. Sometimes I think I know her and sometimes I wish I did. There is a story in her eyes, lullabies, and goodbye. When she's looking back at me I can tell...she's hurting inside.

It's getting colder now and the darkness consumes me. Depression is slowly creeping up. Maybe one day you'll actually care about me.

Never underestimate the pain of a person because the truth is everyone is struggling. It's just some people hide it better than others.

She smiles with all that she has left, yet tears are left un-dried. And though she's got so much to say, she bottles it up inside. If you look past her broken eyes to a shadow no one sees, a disguise so you won't recognize, the girl is really me...

There's nothing more depressing than having it all and still feeling sad.

I'm tired of being nice to people who don't give a shit about me.

I'm just a fucked up girl living in a fucked up life in a fucked up world. Welcome to where being me is -*Never Enough*-

Sometimes the pain's too strong to bare...and life gets so hard you just don't care. You feel so alone you just sit and cry...every second you wish you could die. Then you start thinking who would care...if one day they woke up-and you weren't there.

I could go on with my day and act like everything is okay. But as my life goes on it hurts more in every way.

She can't hide no matter how hard she tries, her secret disguised behind the lies. And at night she cries away her pride, with eyes shut tight staring at her inside. All her friends know why she can't sleep at night, all her family asking is she alright. All she wants to do is get rid of this hell, well all she's got to do is stop kiddin herself. She can only fool herself for so long...

You'll just never know...soo many emotions I choose not to show..

Know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside, to try to kill the pain on the inside.

I see the blood all over your hands. Does it make you feel more like a man? Was it all just a part of your plan? The pistol's shaking in my hands...and all i hear is the sound...

I've been weak and I've been strong. I've been thru the fire and I've been thru the storm. Try to do right and I know I do wrong. Just be happy for me when my life is gone. Cause with no more hurt and no more tears, there will be no more pain and no more fears. No more people in my face that are not sincere. So smile for me when I'm no longer here.

Just because her eyes don't tear doesn't mean her heart doesn't cry. And just because she comes off strong, doesn't mean there's nothing wrong.

I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I don't know what I wanna see. My world use to be worth living for, and now it's hard enough just to be me.

I'm not afraid of the gun in my hand, I'm not afraid of dying, I'm just afraid of the pain it will bring, and to see my best friends crying.

I'm going to smile...and make you think I'm happy...I'm going to laugh...so you don't see me cry...and even if it kills...I'm going to smile.

I'm screwing up every little good thing I ever try to do. I was born to lose